Thursday, January 23, 2014

Everything changes.

The past few months have been life-changing, and I'm very much in a bubble right now. I'm sure I'll leave something out, but here's what's in my head now...

In December, my wonderful dad, Gerald Greenwood, passed away after a long illness (you can read his obituary here). One of the greatest things in my life is knowing that he died the way he wanted to -- in his own bed at home, with my mom, my sister and me surrounding him. He was very much at peace. The funeral was perfect -- everything he wanted -- and we were surrounded by so much love and compassion. I'll never forget the many kindnesses, great and small, that have come to us during this time. I've discovered that there are all sorts of wonderful gifts -- stronger relationships with family, real friends out of acquaintances -- that are totally unexpected yet that you can't imagine living without that blossom in times like this.

I've also learned that, until you experience the death of a parent, you can't possibly truly understand what it's like. I always thought I did, but I was wrong. To all my friends and relatives that have lost a parent, I am so sorry. There's just nothing else to say. I get it.

Without a doubt, these months have been the hardest of my whole life. I never thought I could be so sad for so long. I keep hearing that it won't get better, just different. That the waves of grief aren't as sharp or as frequent, though they're always with you.

The other big change in December -- though I guess I really haven't processed it yet -- is that I left Cheverly Community Market. I have been with the Market (except for one season) since its start, first as web designer, then as online coordinator, and finally as communications manager. I'm very proud of the great things the Market has accomplished and I'll always treasure my time and experience -- and the wonderful people who make it so very special. In coming seasons, I'll occasionally be there as a vendor, but I'm really looking forward to sitting under the tents and enjoying breakfast and friends. I'm also available for work -- design, communications, photography, you name it.  Visit my site for more information.

So those are the two big things that have happened recently -- it's going to take time to reconfigure my life to reflect these changes, and I honestly don't know how long that will take. I feel like I'm saying "I don't know" a lot these days -- the one thing I am sure of is that I don't really know anything. I hear that's a good place to be.

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