Sunday, October 12, 2008

I am breaking up with you.

Dear Starbucks,
We've been together for a long, long (long, long) time. I've loved you through thick (Chantico) and thin (you got rid of Chantico...and valencia orange syrup!) I've defended your honor against serious, well-reasoned attacks. But I can't do it any more. You've changed, Starbucks. You. Have. Changed.
What were you thinking with the new soy milk? What is that?!
And, despite inquiries at three -- three -- different stores this morning, your partners insist that the new signature hot chocolate cannot be made with soy milk even though I've read that partners have been trained to make it with soy milk. I tried a tall signature hot chocolate with regular milk and tossed most of it. It's not a creation you should be proud of. Really. All style, no substance. I expected better from you.
You used to be so right. Now you're just, well, wrong. And so our love is at an end. I will no longer pay $5 for a dry soy venti cappucino. I will no longer giddily celebrate the return of summer with a venti iced americano with an extra shot. I just can't. I thought we were happy together, but I can't take this anymore. You take and take and take and never give back. You've made me so sad, Starbucks.
I'll miss you, but I'll get by. Somehow.

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